Something's Happening

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For the past month, every single second has literally been "what the hell".
What is going on?
You know what? That's okay. Whatever. That's fine.
FUCK!
Yeah...yeah... That's fi-- FUCK!
I'll just manage with this bullshit.

:angry: 

And on a turning point:
Oh, really? Well... Yay for me.
Holy shit! Good stuff is happening to me.
What the fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck?!

:trapped: 

That may seem vague to you, but I have no other way of describing my mixed emotions for February. It has been the most insane month I've had in a while. Past days cannot even come close to what I'm going through right now. Good and bad. Okay...maybe the six months worth of stuff from late 2010 to early 2011. But that was half a decade. It's done. It's gone.

Let me just list things off because that's the only way I can concentrate on all the mayhem: :fliptable: 

:bulletgreen: Good
                 :bulletpink: My writing
                                ~ I've come to terms that I probably won't be able to post like I used to. I'm not lacking in internet or ideas. I don't have writer's block. I just haven't written as much as I want. Lately, I've been so busy working on my novella ever so slowly. Things are finally adding up. I'm understanding characters that I just through in the book for the fun of it. However, I discovered they are linked to some portion of my life. I'm attached to them now. Their journeys, their stories, are keeping me on the edge of my seat. I'm in love with my fictional characters! I haven't felt this love in so long. I'm happy things are finally falling into place after a decade of writing this story.
                                ~ Working on the novella hasn't been the only thing for my writing. I can't say too much about it, but something has happened that may actually put me on the path I want to be. The little voice in the back of my mind won't stop claiming that it's a hoax. It's fake. There's no point in believing what I've been promised. But I can only hope.
                 :bulletpurple: Work
                                ~ I swear work can be the death of me sometimes. It's not the customers. It's my co-workers. I can barely stand clocking in some days because I might snap. Yet, I manage through my day. Last month, I mentioned I had applied for the head cashier position at my job. Only I wanted was an interview; it was my goal. After a long wait, I thought they had already filled the position with someone outside the store. Until today. After I got home from work, I received a phone call from a manager wanting me to come in tomorrow, which is my day off. I was about to end the voicemail and continue on with something else but stopped when I heard they wanted me to come in for an interview for the position. I'm was flabbergasted... I'm still am! Today, while at work, I was a "head cashier in acting" because we had several trainees and they needed me to attend to each one. Now, I have an interview for the actual position. I'm overwhelmed by excitement and nervousness. I just hope I do well.

:bulletred: Bad
             :bulletorange: Cosplay
                               ~ Yes, I cosplay! My friend got me into cosplaying a few years back. This year, I'm attending A-kon and will be cosplaying Clear from DRAMAtical Murder. Why is this bad? It's not... Just BUYING EVERYTHING AND RECEIVING BROKEN SHIT IS BULLSHIT! That's all.
             :bulletyellow: Work
                               ~ Oh! Lookie there! Work, again. I'm not going to complain about my issues with my co-workers and by "my co-workers" I mean the front end, the cashiers. I'm complaining about the pricks in my boyfriend's departments--hardware and tool world. They have literally lost my respect and every time they attempt speaking to me, they get a simple "fuck off". They have made false accusations about my boyfriend's work performance. Claiming he refuses assisting customers and lacks hard work when cleaning his departments. Yesterday, he got written up because of the lies and almost got fired. They even thought about writing him up because I help him clean when we're closing together. It's quite aggravating that my boyfriend is fighting for his job when he's done everything for them. He was one of the best employees they had until someone blamed him for allowing someone steal $500 worth of carpet when, in fact, the manager of the flooring department gave the carpet away. I don't understand why they feel the need to attack someone, who has put their heart and soul into a company they call home. It destroys me when I have to see him being tortured at work. I stand my ground the best I can, while defending him. I just feel like I can do so much more.

All these things may not seem like they add up to a month, but believe me, not all these happened in one day or one week. At the beginning of the month, I was given a 1,000 piece puzzle and was told to have it together by the end of February. I wish things would settle down for a moment.




On another note! Chapter is out from the novella. It took me forever, but it's done! :faint: 

Chapter 1: Reasrien

Rearisen (Chapter 1) by sandracaskey

Chapter 2: Her Glow

Her Glow (Chapter 2) by sandracaskey

These are in PDF format. They cannot be seen by mobile devices!

Thank you for reading the entire journal! Thank you even if you just skimmed it! Thank you, everyone, for being incredible watchers. I'm grateful for your comments and favorites. I'm thankful for your support.
© 2016 - 2024 sandracaskey
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