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For the past month, every single second has literally been "what the hell".
What is going on?
You know what? That's okay. Whatever. That's fine.
FUCK!
Yeah...yeah... That's fi-- FUCK!
And on a turning point:
Oh, really? Well... Yay for me.
Holy shit! Good stuff is happening to me.
What the fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck?!
Holy shit! Good stuff is happening to me.
What the fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck?!
That may seem vague to you, but I have no other way of describing my mixed emotions for February. It has been the most insane month I've had in a while. Past days cannot even come close to what I'm going through right now. Good and bad. Okay...maybe the six months worth of stuff from late 2010 to early 2011. But that was half a decade. It's done. It's gone.
Let me just list things off because that's the only way I can concentrate on all the mayhem:
Good
My writing
~ I've come to terms that I probably won't be able to post like I used to. I'm not lacking in internet or ideas. I don't have writer's block. I just haven't written as much as I want. Lately, I've been so busy working on my novella ever so slowly. Things are finally adding up. I'm understanding characters that I just through in the book for the fun of it. However, I discovered they are linked to some portion of my life. I'm attached to them now. Their journeys, their stories, are keeping me on the edge of my seat. I'm in love with my fictional characters! I haven't felt this love in so long. I'm happy things are finally falling into place after a decade of writing this story.
~ Working on the novella hasn't been the only thing for my writing. I can't say too much about it, but something has happened that may actually put me on the path I want to be. The little voice in the back of my mind won't stop claiming that it's a hoax. It's fake. There's no point in believing what I've been promised. But I can only hope.
Work
~ I swear work can be the death of me sometimes. It's not the customers. It's my co-workers. I can barely stand clocking in some days because I might snap. Yet, I manage through my day. Last month, I mentioned I had applied for the head cashier position at my job. Only I wanted was an interview; it was my goal. After a long wait, I thought they had already filled the position with someone outside the store. Until today. After I got home from work, I received a phone call from a manager wanting me to come in tomorrow, which is my day off. I was about to end the voicemail and continue on with something else but stopped when I heard they wanted me to come in for an interview for the position. I'm was flabbergasted... I'm still am! Today, while at work, I was a "head cashier in acting" because we had several trainees and they needed me to attend to each one. Now, I have an interview for the actual position. I'm overwhelmed by excitement and nervousness. I just hope I do well.
Bad
Cosplay
~ Yes, I cosplay! My friend got me into cosplaying a few years back. This year, I'm attending A-kon and will be cosplaying Clear from DRAMAtical Murder. Why is this bad? It's not... Just BUYING EVERYTHING AND RECEIVING BROKEN SHIT IS BULLSHIT! That's all.
Work
~ Oh! Lookie there! Work, again. I'm not going to complain about my issues with my co-workers and by "my co-workers" I mean the front end, the cashiers. I'm complaining about the pricks in my boyfriend's departments--hardware and tool world. They have literally lost my respect and every time they attempt speaking to me, they get a simple "fuck off". They have made false accusations about my boyfriend's work performance. Claiming he refuses assisting customers and lacks hard work when cleaning his departments. Yesterday, he got written up because of the lies and almost got fired. They even thought about writing him up because I help him clean when we're closing together. It's quite aggravating that my boyfriend is fighting for his job when he's done everything for them. He was one of the best employees they had until someone blamed him for allowing someone steal $500 worth of carpet when, in fact, the manager of the flooring department gave the carpet away. I don't understand why they feel the need to attack someone, who has put their heart and soul into a company they call home. It destroys me when I have to see him being tortured at work. I stand my ground the best I can, while defending him. I just feel like I can do so much more.
All these things may not seem like they add up to a month, but believe me, not all these happened in one day or one week. At the beginning of the month, I was given a 1,000 piece puzzle and was told to have it together by the end of February. I wish things would settle down for a moment.
On another note! Chapter is out from the novella. It took me forever, but it's done!
Chapter 1: Reasrien
Chapter 2: Her Glow
These are in PDF format. They cannot be seen by mobile devices!
Thank you for reading the entire journal! Thank you even if you just skimmed it! Thank you, everyone, for being incredible watchers. I'm grateful for your comments and favorites. I'm thankful for your support.
Let me just list things off because that's the only way I can concentrate on all the mayhem:
Good
My writing
~ I've come to terms that I probably won't be able to post like I used to. I'm not lacking in internet or ideas. I don't have writer's block. I just haven't written as much as I want. Lately, I've been so busy working on my novella ever so slowly. Things are finally adding up. I'm understanding characters that I just through in the book for the fun of it. However, I discovered they are linked to some portion of my life. I'm attached to them now. Their journeys, their stories, are keeping me on the edge of my seat. I'm in love with my fictional characters! I haven't felt this love in so long. I'm happy things are finally falling into place after a decade of writing this story.
~ Working on the novella hasn't been the only thing for my writing. I can't say too much about it, but something has happened that may actually put me on the path I want to be. The little voice in the back of my mind won't stop claiming that it's a hoax. It's fake. There's no point in believing what I've been promised. But I can only hope.
Work
~ I swear work can be the death of me sometimes. It's not the customers. It's my co-workers. I can barely stand clocking in some days because I might snap. Yet, I manage through my day. Last month, I mentioned I had applied for the head cashier position at my job. Only I wanted was an interview; it was my goal. After a long wait, I thought they had already filled the position with someone outside the store. Until today. After I got home from work, I received a phone call from a manager wanting me to come in tomorrow, which is my day off. I was about to end the voicemail and continue on with something else but stopped when I heard they wanted me to come in for an interview for the position. I'm was flabbergasted... I'm still am! Today, while at work, I was a "head cashier in acting" because we had several trainees and they needed me to attend to each one. Now, I have an interview for the actual position. I'm overwhelmed by excitement and nervousness. I just hope I do well.
Bad
Cosplay
~ Yes, I cosplay! My friend got me into cosplaying a few years back. This year, I'm attending A-kon and will be cosplaying Clear from DRAMAtical Murder. Why is this bad? It's not... Just BUYING EVERYTHING AND RECEIVING BROKEN SHIT IS BULLSHIT! That's all.
Work
~ Oh! Lookie there! Work, again. I'm not going to complain about my issues with my co-workers and by "my co-workers" I mean the front end, the cashiers. I'm complaining about the pricks in my boyfriend's departments--hardware and tool world. They have literally lost my respect and every time they attempt speaking to me, they get a simple "fuck off". They have made false accusations about my boyfriend's work performance. Claiming he refuses assisting customers and lacks hard work when cleaning his departments. Yesterday, he got written up because of the lies and almost got fired. They even thought about writing him up because I help him clean when we're closing together. It's quite aggravating that my boyfriend is fighting for his job when he's done everything for them. He was one of the best employees they had until someone blamed him for allowing someone steal $500 worth of carpet when, in fact, the manager of the flooring department gave the carpet away. I don't understand why they feel the need to attack someone, who has put their heart and soul into a company they call home. It destroys me when I have to see him being tortured at work. I stand my ground the best I can, while defending him. I just feel like I can do so much more.
All these things may not seem like they add up to a month, but believe me, not all these happened in one day or one week. At the beginning of the month, I was given a 1,000 piece puzzle and was told to have it together by the end of February. I wish things would settle down for a moment.
On another note! Chapter is out from the novella. It took me forever, but it's done!
Chapter 1: Reasrien
Chapter 2: Her Glow
These are in PDF format. They cannot be seen by mobile devices!
Thank you for reading the entire journal! Thank you even if you just skimmed it! Thank you, everyone, for being incredible watchers. I'm grateful for your comments and favorites. I'm thankful for your support.
Thank You
I wanted to give everyone a big thank you for the support and feedback on my recent writings! I took a four year hiatus to heal and fix what was wrong in my life. For those years, I even put my writing on hold until I came to the conclusion that it was my lifeline. It saved me when others couldn't. It was there when no one else was. I hope my future projects will display my experience. I can't display my thoughts into simplistic words but rather in imagery. I love words and it's an addiction. A couple of days ago, I discovered that "Thunderous Home" had received Daily Deviation. I wanted to scream and cheer, but I bawled. I wish I could describe how grateful I am. Thank you, again, for the support! On a funny note, while enduring several hours of dental work yesterday, I created a new piece. "Shower Thoughts" is the title, and I'll be submitting it pretty soon.
The Truth
It has been over a month since my last journal. I know I promised I would keep these journals up to date, but stupidly I can never keep that promise. I just wanted to inform those who have been questioning my existence, if I'm still around. So, please let me address some things before vanishing again. (Hopefully, I don't vanish for too long.) :begone:
:bulletpink: The 100% truth of my disappearance is I'm incompetent of keeping track of everything. Wattpad, Wordpress, Instagram, Facebook, and Deviantart. Over time, it is quite obvious that my momentum was dying. I stopped posting the weekly updates on my blog. The new and "rare" poems for "I
Keeping Up With Lost Times
First and foremost, I would like to thank the few new watchers I have gained in the last couple of days. Thank you so much!!
For those that don't know, I'm slowly returning. I have submitted some new works I hope you will enjoy. The first chapter for my little project has also been submitted. The title Reasrien. It's in a PDF format, so it won't be seen through the DA app or hardly on a phone browser. The best place to view is through the website, itself. I worked my ass off trying to get it where I actually like it. Still not fully impressed, but I haven't written a chapter in a while. Now, chapter two is on the way and shouldn't be as ha
Here I Am, Again...
Man, I really need to keep these things updated. I say I do, but really? Do I ever? Nope! I have forgotten anyone. Why must I be an adult with responsibilities?!
But I come bearing good news! Chapter one of the "novella" or whatever I called it before--oops!--has been finished. Normally, writing chapters don't take me long. Though, I do have to admit I never worked on it unless I was working an insane shift down at lumber in my little, handy-dandy notebook. (Please get the reference.) It's a bad habit of mine to venture away from projects and then come back weeks in the future. I'm not quite sure why, exactly, but 2016 will be a special year
© 2016 - 2024 sandracaskey
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